I do so love these words of a centering meditation:

 

flower fresh

mountain strong

reflecting water calm

 

Innocent and open, strong and resilient, peaceful and walking in beauty, this is a beautiful place to restore myself to.  I though about this one morning as I looked out my window and watched the wild wind whip through a tree.  I thought of the turbulence in my life.  My eyes scanned from the frantic leaves down to the trunk of the tree that stood strong and motionless amid the fury.  I thought that I want to be strong in the wind like the trunk, but yet I do not want to be stagnant and not move.  But then, I thought, what if the stillness, the turbulence, the flying free, the sitting still, was all I could see because it was all that I was accustomed to see.  What if I was the mountain, towering above the sky, roots deep into the earth, but all that my eyes would see is the surface of the mountain; the trees, the sunshine, the wind, the snow?  What if most of my days until now were spend roaming around the surface and never in exploring the depths of all that I was?  So in my silence, I entered the mountain.

 

I began my journey within the vision I knew.  I saw the trees, the snow, the squirrels that scurry along the branches.  I started beside a tree top and slowly descended, I felt the gentle breeze and the suns rays shining between the branches.  Down, down, to the base of the tree where the rocks met the snow and the pine needles on the surface.  I then submerged below the ground into darkness. With the cold and dark, anxiety pumped through my veins, I could hear my heart beat in my ears. I breathe deep to accept and not judge.  I am somewhere between me and what other’s perceive to be me.  Oh God, did I really give so many people this much power over me?  I cannot feel where one begins and the other ends.  Like a storm in my consciousness with interlaced stratified clouds of screams of desperation and silent knowing, I feel them moving in and out of me, out of what I think is me.  I continue to descend.

 

Lower, down.  I think I hear, drops of water sliding between layers of rock.  I know I have passed beneath the surface of the earth.  The drops slow as they cool, and then harden into ice.  Ice that threatens to split the rock.   But I am the rock, I quiet myself, I accept.  I stiffen, freeze and split.  The pain is so excruciating as layers break away.  I fear I am losing all myself.  Is this what death is?  When will it end?  I shutter, I shake and then I am still. I am lighter, but I am more expansive.  I am still existing, but all of what I thought was me is no longer in my perception.  My thoughts seem to echo in my head as if my own voice is calling me from all the directions around me.  I descend further into the music, ringing through crystalline caverns.  The deeper I go, the more I sense that so many crystals were really one.

 

Lower, down. I think I see the warm glow of the heart of the earth, where all matter is dissolved into one.  Effortlessly, I melt.  I am a sea of warm ambrosia, glowing, flowing, knowing.  I am nothing, but I am everything.  Every once in a while this truth will explode to the surface, where I had seemed to live so much of my life.  But here, deep inside of me, is all there is.  No matter where I run or where I seek, there I am, there I always was.  My heart is home in the core, love lives in the heart, this is where I belong, this is who I am.  There is no “I,” there is only all.

 

I open my eyes.  I observe again the surface of the mountain.  But I am not there.

 

Smile.

 

Flower fresh.

 

Surprisingly, quite a few things, when I get out of my own way (smile).

The "rebel" was important to my identity at one time, for he helped me see ignorance and choose truth, break away from the traditional and find new ideas, release myself from limits and pursue what other's said could not be done.  But the rebel finds identity through opposition, which can serve to define and start a new path.  But for me to increase my awareness above the limits inherent in the opposition of the rebel, I must kill the rebel within.  For he cannot come where I want to go.

I know what I would like "power" to mean, but this is word that has been so drenched in ego over centuries that I do not resonate with it.  I struggle to find a word that does not have this association but captures the essence. 

In physics "power" is energy per unit time, or the rate work is performed, or the flow of energy over a duration.  So it could be focused awareness and energy that can sustain over time, transcends over time to perform great work.  The more focused and pure the energy, the greater the power, the greater the works.

I'll try to think of a shorter word in the future, but for now I would like to call it aware-energy-sustaining-great-works.

Early in the morning when the outside is quiet, or after exercise when the inside is quiet.  But I try to be able to do this at any time after something "spikes" in my awareness.

I would like to let go of "worry" itself.  I would like to drop the self-imposed "pity party" mode of dreading a possible outcome.  The Master Christ reminds us that worry has never added a single moment to a man's life.  Society has so highly trained us in the skills that are negative that it takes a lot of energy to stop ourselves from unconsciously slipping into negative future fantasies.  I think the key to this, and many other things, is to be aware and in the present.  Worry exists in the future as regret exists in the past. Now and aware is to heal many things.

Remember me.

 

I will be with you in the grave

on the night you leave behind

your shop and your family.

When you hear my soft voice

echoing in your tomb,

you will realize

that you were never hidden from my eyes.

I am the pure awareness within your heart,

with you during joy and celebration,

suffering and despair.

 

On that strange and fateful night

you will hear a familiar voice --

you'll be rescued from the fangs of snakes

and the searing sting of scorpions.

The euphoria of love will sweep over your grave;

it will bring wine and friends, candles and food.

 

When the light of realization dawns,

shouting and upheaval

will rise up from the graves!

The dust of ages will be stirred

by the cities of ecstasy,

by the banging of drums,

by the clamor of revolt!

 

Dead bodies will tear off their shrouds

and stuff their ears in fright--

What use are the senses and the ears

before the blast of that Trumpet?

 

Look and you will see my form

whether you are looking at yourself

or toward that noise and confusion.

 

Don't be blurry-eyed,

See me clearly-

See my beauty without the old eyes of delusion.

 

Beware! Beware!

Don't mistake me for this human form.

The soul is not obscured by forms.

Even if it were wrapped in a hundred folds of felt

the rays of the soul's light

would still shine through.

 

Beat the drum,

Follow the minstrels of the city.

It's a day of renewal

when every young man

walks boldly on the path of love.

 

Had everyone sought God

Instead of crumbs and copper coins

They would not be sitting on the edge of the moat

in darkness and regret.

 

What kind of gossip-house

have you opened in our city?

Close your lips

and shine on the world

like loving sunlight.

 

Shine like the Sun of Tabriz rising in the East.

Shine like the star of victory.

Shine like the whole universe is yours!

                                                        -Rumi

 

 

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Can you now remember

what the mind worked so hard to forsake?

Are you living?  Are you dead?

Are you none of these?

you lie so still upon the ground

I look upon you and smile

breathe once more, you will see

sing for your suffering

dance for your despair

you are the sword's razor edge

tested in flames

coming home

 

the strain of madness

can hold you no more

the fire, nothing more to consume

your lover is here

to kiss your wounds

and pour the sweet wine

 

Awake, awareness practiced perfect

to hear the whispers of soul

the winds of ten directions

amidst the concrete cacophony

amidst the seduction of sound and fury

in courageous awareness of awareness

awakening falls like a plum from the tree

 

living death, the illusion of separation

castle walls, prison cells

running, hiding from devils

running from ourselves

 

still, there is a moment of choice

can you see for who you are?

or do you still desire your torment?

 

ripe plum, open, what you once thought were eyes

and the fading nightmares fall away

beautiful butterfly, they were your cocoon

 

you can still see and be of form

but need one, you do not

let it not possess you, but serve you

and the knowledge of who you are

light, dark

being, nothingness

 

Your heartbeat, echoes over canyons

melody of the way

harmony with souls that seek

the rhythm of lovers

who love, and die, and love again

 

So many choose the false

through choice or ignorance

crippled terror in asylums of mind

yearning hearts buried alive

 

why bother to speak?

words can no longer express

cry, laugh

moan in delight

dance in sweet silence

 

Oh, the brilliant light becomes you

another great light in the heavens

your light, draws the darkness awake

someone calls your name

                                                  - Sajan

Express yourself completely.
then become quiet.
Open yourself
to heaven and earth
and be like the forces of nature:
when the wind blows
there is only the wind;
when it rains
there is only rain;
when the clouds pass
the sun promises to shine.
If you open yourself to insight
you are one with insight
and you can use it completely.
Open yourself to heaven and earth
then trust your natural resonses;
and everything will fall into place
                                               - Lao Tsu

---------------------------------------------------------------

if your message
will not fit a bottle
then let it fill the ocean
Speak
and let your voice be thunder
Cry
and let it fall like rain
release it all
until there is nothing
and there you are
Beyond the echo of your heartbeat
there you always were
only now
you see
your hear
Beyond knowingness
you know
you feel
Silent
madness of mind
be wild
be yourself
be
                 - Sajan

http://www.davidstanleybell.com/newsletter/archives/Sept2009PoetryfortheJourneyNewsletter.html